Newsletter #9: Halloween Song No. 2 & New Beatles

"After I Die" (below) is a new COMEDY song that ISN'T ABOUT ME, but Jim doesn't like it because he doesn't like to think about me dying, so I get that. And my friend Jane, when I played it in her living room last week, didn't love it because "It doesn't sound like you!"

However, they BOTH agreed it was funny and witty and worked AS A SONG. They just didn't like me doing it. :)

But I made it for your Halloween Playlist because it's silly and perfect for the kind of dark humor Halloween plays around with. Me, I like to joke around about death because that's what this kind of holiday is meant to do. It's like laughing at monsters or going to a horror movie. It's good for the soul. I swear I wasn't trying to upset anyone.

But before that, my Beatles Sing-Along video of the week. It's short because this past Wednesday was John Lennon's birthday, so a big band took our place in the garden and they had an all-day Beatles sing-along where the huge crowd sang all the songs with the band.

But on Friday, we got our usual morning slot and I managed to coax a few ADORABLE folks up to sing. https://youtu.be/m0p_riKg1MA

AFTER I DIE
©2024 by Steve Schalchlin

After I die I want college students
Playing with my bones
Breaking in on drunken nights
After hours puppet shows

When I will my body
To a science class
They can play with all my parts
And show my bony ass

I won’t care
Playing marbles with my eye
I won’t care
After I die

After I'm gone hang my skeleton
High on Halloween
Scare the kids on trick or treat
Make them scream

I will listen closely
From the great beyond
I’ll come back and haunt them
Even after I’m gone
I won’t care
After I die

Since you’ve already torn my heart to shreds.
And hosted so many others in my bed
Since you’ve cut me apart
While me I’m still alive
I won’t care
Cuz I’ll be hard and dry
After I die

Use me like a sex toy
Or beat me like a drum
Finally I can be of use
To someone

You already killed me inside
And that’s why
I won’t care
After I die

See? It's just some dark humor for a dark and spooky night. Put it on your Halloween playlist and run it all night! Or better yet, make a video with yourself singing it in costume! I'll feature you here on the newsletter!

Spotify link:
https://open.spotify.com/track/3Hdl72zMzYa5SnldRJszsr?si=9269925824f94ed0

Apple Music link:
https://music.apple.com/us/album/after-i-die-feat-bonus-round-band-single/1773280518

Amazon Music:
https://music.amazon.com/albums/B0DJRPD99B?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_KwBgNSaXyudXZ58yePvdPXoYR&trackAsin=B0DJRPNJGT

YouTube Music:
https://youtu.be/wgqB6FLwBxY?si=hDhBdP4WAOLzU47C

[This is the hand-crafted, no-AI, non-bot newsletter of Steve Schalchlin. If you wish to be sign up for the list, send an email steveshack@gmail.com.]

#8: Halloween Song #1 - Zombie Funk

I know you've been looking for Halloween songs for your party playlist or to play for the trick-or-treaters. I got ya!

Also, this week at Strawberry Fields, singing Beatles songs with Gavin Gold, I made a video made on my birthday featuring tourists from around the world. They are so adorable and it's personally thrilling to be able to spread so much joy.

Beatles video:
https://youtu.be/XCl0TbHCAfM?si=e4HA-chFt2XNTTDl.)

The Zombie song is a few years old. But next week, I have a brand NEW Halloween song. Both of these enlist a little dark humor. And if you look really closely, maybe a little social commentary. But mostly, it's fun and silly. Lyrics for today's song with links below:

ZOMBIE FUNK (I'm So Glad I'm Not A Zombie)
©2015 Steve Schalchlin

If I were a zombie
I’d stare into space
and wander around
Shuffling from room to room

If I were a zombie
I’d stumble thru life
Not noticing art
Looking for stuff to consume
Stuff to consume

My skin would be rotting
My teeth falling out
My arm prob’ly broken
My legs barely moving
No grooving to the music

I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
I’m so glad I’m not a zombie

No, not me

If I were a zombie
I wouldn’t have to think
I’d just let feelings
Push me into the street


I’d see other zombies
And smell their zombie stink
But I wouldn’t notice
I’d only want fresh meat

My feet, they would fall off
My hands, they would grasp for
More steaming entrails
People to tear apart
Lives to annihilate
No time to hate just moving on
Just moving on

I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
I’m so glad i’m not a zombie
I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
No, not me, no way

I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
I’m so glad i’m not a zombie

Like you
I’d be surrounded by flies
I give each one a name
They’d bury eggs within me
and I get to know their kids
I’m so glad I’m not a zombie
I’m so glad i’m not a zombie

Like you

YouTube link with lyrics:
https://youtu.be/uwNvdLTMZiw?si=NCuIfmNGk-yFbrSU

Spotify link:
https://open.spotify.com/track/1hMlQxVcZ0bKj4tSZofmdp?si=ccfae08e27234ad6

Apple Music:
https://music.apple.com/us/album/zombie-funk-feat-steve-schalchlin-single/1050474927

Amazon Music:
https://amazon.com/music/player/albums/B016SS9K9Y?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_3VpYytBZDrA7GOoQUpxLIhVd8&trackAsin=B016SS9L5C

[This is the hand-crafted, no-AI, non-bot newsletter of Steve Schalchlin. If you wish to be removed from the list, send me an email. If someone sent you this and you want to be added, write me at steveshack@gmail.com]

#7b: Birthday Quick Links to "All That and More"

Today actually is my birthday, so All That and More is officially released. Here are the lyrics and the links to listen to the song are below.

All That and More
©2024 by Steve Schalchlin

I recall a meal aboard a
Luxury cruise line
Where the champagne was poured
From a silver chalice
Engraved with the name of
An old Russian palace

Then an orchestra played
A gossamer icing
Danced across the mirrored floor
I look at you and think
You are all that and more

I saw a museum in Paris
On a tree-lined boulevard
With Picassos on the walls
Adorned in rivers of blue
Even recognized
A masterpiece or two

I’ve climbed the Great Wall
Stretched across China
Saw fields as old as the sun
With acres of gardens
Planted centuries before
Then I see you and think
You are all that and more

The aurora borealis
Dazzling curtains of color
With light from heaven’s shore
Of every place I’ve ever been
Any poem I’ve ever read
Every song that’s drifted through my door
But then I look into your eyes and see
You are all that and more

You are all that and more

Spotfy link:
https://open.spotify.com/track/6gMu9D4z5qtRlXoFQiSRGu?si=2bbf9bad396742d6

Apple Music:
https://music.apple.com/us/album/all-that-and-more-feat-bonus-round-band/1771907094?i=1771907095

YouTube:
https://youtu.be/ID2NJmyOSfc?si=yv2wwB8SjXHbi5FR

Amazon Music:
https://music.amazon.com/albums/B0DJC94VTH?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_Ud0B4BtrPJpYkCjmxP2cKbk2r&trackAsin=B0DJC81HJ9

If you purchase the song, that's the best way to support indie artists like myself. But please feel free to stream it, but if you do, add it to a playlist.

And thank you for all the wonderful good wishes I received this week. Being alive is a miracle so don't waste it! --

Newsletter #7: It's my birthday week!

I'll be 71 on Friday, October 4th.

It seems unfathomable. Jim and I were watching an old What's My Line from the 50s and they introduced a very old man who, when he said he was 70 years old, got a huge round of applause from the audience. Back then, that was OLD. I used to think it was ANCIENT. Unreachable, when I was a kid.

After my AIDS diagnosis and subsequent trauma and near-misses, I remember writing in my diary how much I hoped to just see one staged reading of The Last Session. I didn't so much see it as experience it from the stage still hooked up to "Louie," my feed bag. Some of you may remember those days.

Here's a link to the opening night as recorded in my online diary: http://bonusround.com/july96.html#7_18_96

After I won the lottery and Dr. Bruce Dorsey's magic pills saved my life, my goal was to see the year 2000.

So to be here, still grinding away and writing and recording and playing Beatles music in the park, this is a bonus round I couldn't have expected. I'm still making it up as I go along, not knowing what's going to happen next.

The new song gets officially released on Friday, my birthday. It's called, appropriately, All This and More. It was debuted "live" onboard the Crystal Serenity, our cruise a few weeks ago by a singer named Bruce Hammond, who learned it only two days previously. (I chased him down after breakfast and said, "Hey Bruce! Wanna debut a new song?")

Bruce Hammond did a beautiful job, captured here:

I'll send you the link to my new version next week after it's released so you can include it in your playlists. Meanwhile, enjoy Bruce's version and remember to be grateful for all the people around you and for every breath you take.

If you wish to donate to my work on Venmo or PayPal, use my email steveshack@gmail.com

This is the Steve Schalchlin newsletter. If you wish to be included on the email list, let me know!

Newsletter #6: Monks at a Tea Party

Today, I'm spotlighting a beautiful and peaceful meditation i composed with Blake Zolfo last year called "Monks at a Tea Party."

Going against the current pop trend for shorter and shorter songs, this four-part 17-minute piece begins with "Letting Go" and moves through four phases of relaxation and meditation, but also inspiration and energizing with an end piece called "Safe and Sound."

And no, there are no monks chanting at a tea party. I named it that humorously to describe a moment of stillness in a world of random silliness, avoidance and chaos.

If you're looking for music to relax and de-stress, I highly recommend carving out these few minutes, lying back in a quiet place with a cup of tea or other refreshment and giving "Monks at a Tea Party" a listen.

I created a hypnotic short film featuring the music, which you can find on YouTube.
https://youtu.be/p4DPaT51TIo?si=vvnT5tRcs5tJLQhD

Spotify link:
https://open.spotify.com/track/0dAmYiUOwxIgBz9KooKktm?si=15c9b58d548447da

Apple Music:
https://music.apple.com/us/album/monks-at-a-tea-party-feat-steve-schalchlin-blake-zolfo-ep/1701510138

Amazon Music:
https://amazon.com/music/player/albums/B0CDZ2LT2L?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_7C9KX6HbwhYPq3XYKlbl19mat&trackAsin=B0CDZGVJ7M

As always, you are free to stream the piece, but if you purchase it at Apple or Amazon, it's the best way to support independent artists. It's only 99-cents.

Newsletter #5: Steve Goes Punk?

I told you in previous newsletters about singing Beatles songs in Central Park with Gavin Gold, my South African punk rocker friend from the band Rebel Nerds. We met at a songwriter group and became fast friends.

The Rebel Nerds have a comical, tuneful twist to their music that is totally accessible. Naturally I had to horn in on the act by writing lyrics for them.

So the spotlight single this week is "Sooner or Later," which may be the most mainstream song of the bunch -- and even got a good run on a Bruce Ravid's popular alt-rock playlist, up against a lot of mainstream, big label artists.

Give it a spin and tell me what you think! (And listen to that killer bass line!) I love this YouTube video version with the lyrics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dknUvJL90Ac Sooner or Later: Spotify

https://open.spotify.com/track/5TbFH1N5FH7lVkPn7ctCzl?si=71c8d0d559dd4533

Apple Music:

https://music.apple.com/us/album/sooner-or-later/1571781221?i=1571781226

Amazon Music:

https://amazon.com/music/player/albums/B0BBPFJ62P?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_DJPKHRPrI3xHQdeAACeQevgog

Here's the whole playlist of Rebel Nerd/Steve Schalchlln collaborations:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UwIQFVhykonJlfKtweKzw?si=4ca7084c13a34a9a

As always, purchasing music from these stores helps support indie artists like myself, but feel free to stream for free or share the links. My gift is my song and this one's for you!

Newsletter #4: Someone to Get Groceries With

Last year, I was feeling so old and tired, I literally told myself I was never going to write another song. That I was out of ideas. Exhausted.

Suddenly this year, I'm writing the best songs of my life. There's a lesson here, that if you stop trying so hard and just let the stress and expectations go, the light of inspiration will pop up and shine everywhere you're not looking. That's how this song happened.

It came from a personal ad brought to me by Blake Zoflo, from my Bonus Round Band. It was such an honest statement, "someone to get groceries with," I immediately wrote it down.

Maybe that wish was a reflection of how I was feeling, that instead of looking for THE GREAT AMERICAN SONG with high expectations or unrealistic goals, maybe what we really need in life is a simple song on a small scale, something clear and honest and real.

Blake helped me shape it and I recorded him singing it. If this doesn't melt your heart, you ain't got no heart! :)

Someone to Get Groceries With

Spotify link

https://open.spotify.com/track/5Pr3k6QuduSf0WzL4L3jgq?si=11df76d37a104641

YouTube link

https://youtu.be/vKeihne7JiQ?si=IfEwjwLqtxWbUtv4

Apple Music link

https://music.apple.com/us/album/someone-to-get-groceries-with-feat-bonus-round-band/1748334462?i=1748334463

Amazon Music link

https://music.amazon.com/albums/B0D4XCVRGL?marketplaceId=ATVPDKIKX0DER&musicTerritory=US&ref=dm_sh_lj1hJH2sw2ZxcAwkXTsrBQZ0t

If you purchase the track from Apple Music or Amazon, more money comes to the artists (that's me and Leo the cat!) but you are welcome to stream it for free.

If you wish to support my work more directly using PayPal or Venmo, use my email address steveshack@gmail.com.

[This is the hand crafted no-bot Steve Schalchlin Newsletter. If you wish to unsubscribe, just hit reply and send me a note. If you got this indirectly and you wish me to be on it, write me directly at steveshack@gmail.com! I send it out every Tuesday.]

-- Steve Schalchlin

Living in the Bonus Round

Spotify Links

Love Songs by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/stevelovesongs

Personal Songs by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/stevepersonal

Comic/Humor Songs by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/stevehumor

Inspirational Songs by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/steveinspire

Meditation Music by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/stevemeditate

Political Songs by Steve Schalchlin Spotify Playlist https://tinyurl.com/stevepolitics

Newsletter #3: Oh You Devil

 Thank you for the wonderful notes I got last week after I talked about the loss of two of my best friends. It really warmed my heart to know I'm not alone. Many shared their own experiences of loss and how they coped.

Gavin Gold and I have been playing Beatles songs in Central Park at Strawberry Fields. I've been taping many of the tourists singing along. If you haven't seen them, they are adorable!

Here is "April" singing "Norwegian Wood" with me: 

https://youtu.be/wsq7fgb4k6Y?si=Gw4KYH2-9HjdGxZR

Here are a bunch of tourists singing "Imagine" with us:

https://youtu.be/rLn2t6rwosA?si=iArQjr6el11lcK1_

I'll think you'll get a kick out of them. 

Today's new release is not a love song, but something a bit humorous and a bit edgy because it's my rumination on fame and religion featuring the devil, Jesus and Elvis Presley. Though it takes a slightly caustic eye, a friend of mine who is very religious says it's his favorite song of mine. Another, who is not religious at all, says it's his favorite. So there you go.  

And for my friends who are hard of hearing, the lyrics are included below the links. (Forgive the ALL CAPS).

Official Oh You Devil YouTube link: 

https://youtu.be/HCeMNLEdlWw?si=9ixjdfOK7jjNarIl

Spotify Oh You Devil link: 

https://open.spotify.com/track/6zRq3KO8MSVC4nKrFa6aJE?si=6e02af33ff134078

OH YOU DEVIL

©2024 by Steve Schalchlin

I ONCE WROTE A SONG FOR THE DEVIL

THE DEVIL NEVER WROTE A SONG FOR ME

HE SAID, GET OVER IT MAN I’M THE DEVIL

A SONG FOR YOU

WOULD BE A REDUNDANCY

AND I SAID OH OH OH YOU DEVIL

ARE YOU SAYING I’M MY OWN WORST ENEMY?

YOU ARE STILL THE DEVIL I KNOW

BUT YOU WERE BORN AN ANGEL

IS A DEVIL WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO BE?

I ONCE WROTE A SONG TO JESUS

JESUS NEVER WROTE A SONG FOR ME

I SAID JESUS WON’T YOU HELP ME 

WITH MY BURDENS

HE SAID, LOOK AROUND, SON, COME ON, YOU’RE ALREADY FREE

AND I SAID OH OH OH YOU DEVIL

ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY I’M MY OWN WORST ENEMY?

WELL, IT’S STILL THE DEVIL I KNOW

HE SAID, YOU WERE BORN AN ANGEL

AND AN ANGEL IS WHAT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE

I ONCE WROTE A SONG TO ELVIS PRESLEY

I SAID ELVIS, GUESS WHAT, YOU’RE A DEITY

HE SAID ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS DIE WHEN THEY STILL LOVE YOU

AND YOU WILL STAY THE AGE THEY THEY WANTED YOU TO BE

AND I SAID OH OH OH YOU DEVIL

ARE YOU SAYING I CAN’T LIVE UNTIL I DIE

I’M STILL THE DEVIL I KNOW

THO I WAS BORN AN ANGEL

I KEEP A BIT OF DEVIL IN MY EYE

Newsletter #2: Past Life

 The full studio version of PAST LIFE, my new single this week, is available for preview, with links to the streaming services on this page.

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/steveschalchlin/past-life-feat-bonus-round-band

Or there's a YouTube link. https://youtu.be/rm6vp_b0-P0?si=nNnJc3zUirjJbKAb

I'm dedicating this to two people who I lost last month under tragic circumstances, Chris Parks and Ronda Espy. 

Ronda was the music publisher and producer of The Last Session, believing in me (along with her husband, Kim) when I was at my most weak. When death was literally around the corner until the new drug arrived, which I received as a result of a nationwide lottery. She suffered an accident that cascaded tragically. I will never be able to repay her or her family for what they did for me in the worst of circumstances.

Chris was an Internet friend and vet who I met in person and who suffered from PTSD in ways I can't begin to describe. I'm still unsure of what happened because I don't know his family. 

I hope you listen and enjoy. And if you purchase it on Apple Music or Amazon Music, that'll help feed Leo the Cat. 

Newsletter #1: I Only See You Young

 I'm proud to announce I've released "I Only See You Young" as a new single. 

This link will take you to where you can listen to it, whether you're on a streaming service or not.

https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/steveschalchlin/i-only-see-you-young-feat-bonus-round-band-2

Enjoy!

Tourists singing "Imagine" at Strawberry Fields - Aug 1 2024

Steve Schalchlin Serenity Concert Feb 1 2024

My comeback!

Yesterday (Beatles cover)

Working Class Hero (John Lennon cover)

Beatles Revolution by Strawberry Feels

My friend Gavin Gold and I have created a new Beatles cover duo called Strawberry Feels.

Follow-up

 The Denver production was glorious. I'm not writing much in this blog because I'm writing a private diary and doing social media elsewhere, though I confess I'm really more into music, exercise, my acting class and being alive than I am about being a social media personality. It's just too exhausting.

Also, I've worked out my book outline and believe I should focus on that. It'd make a great movie.

It would! 

Also, we went to dinner in the Village with friends. I love these old places. This bathroom is exquisite.