Monk Fight! Monk Fight!

Two arrested after church fight

Israeli police have arrested two clergyman after an argument between monks erupted into a brawl next to the site of Jesus' tomb. WITH VIDEO!

Come to see "New World Waking!" There's a song that directly addresses religious violence.

"I raised my hand and
Asked the guide why
Holy Lands have
So much dirt

Is 'cuz we still believe
There's such a thing
As Holy Dirt?"

Sunshine Salad & Ando!

Isn't that a sweet picture? That's Michael. I love my friend Michael.

Yesterday, our mutual friend Marc (one of the TLS fan crowd who is now a friend) was out from the east coast as part of his job. So, we went out a nice lunch -- Sunshine Salad at the Magnolia Grill.

He said he hadn't seen any celebrities.

"First time in El Lay?" I asked.

"Yeeahh." Marc has this very cool way about him. He's nice to be around. We established early on that neither of us did small talk very well, but we were making each other laugh and just enjoying our Sunshine Salad.

"I like all this sun," he said.

(Yesterday was sunny in the upper 70s with a slightly cool breeze; the little bit of Pacific ocean that managed to crawl over the Hollywood hills was wafting in little wavelets through the dry desert air.)

"I do, too."

He'd be going back to the land of snow and ice.

He said he and Michael had done the Beverly Hills tour the day before.

That's when Michael called. He was home. So we went to his place for our homosexual orgy: We played show tunes and sang together at Michael's piano -- the one I helped him pick out.

Okay, not just any showtunes. I sang my own show tunes: "Connected" from TLS and then "My Thanksgiving Prayer" which is a part of New World Waking! (WORLD DEBUT DEC. 1st! in case you haven't been paying attention.)

Marc took a picture of my hands. Veiny! Sleek!

Michael also had the sheet music to "Seasons of Love" from RENT. I love that little piano combination at the top of that song. It's like magic when someone composes a simple progression that, from the first two chords, identifies the song. And "Seasons of Love" brings tears to my eyes before any words get sung.

So, we all caught up with each other and did big hugs and kisses, and it was nice. I like having friends. It was hard saying goodbye.

CELEBRITY SIGHTING!

Later, I was volunteering down at Kulak's Woodshed running one of the cameras.

(Dr. Ruchi says my blood sugars are too high and that she supported my volunteering as a type of physical therapy, along with jogging and low carbs. She said if I can't make them come down through diet and exercise, she's gonna put me on some injectable. That's all I needed to hear. But, man, am I weak. After about an hour, I was exhausted. Luckily, at that point, we switched cameras and I could move to one where I could sit.)

It was a songwriter's circle featuring Kevin So, a singer I was not familiar with. But man, he's good. The other artists were also top notch -- Kyler England also standing out -- but he wowed me with his easy charm, literate lyrics, beautifully reedy tenor voice and real soul in his performances, particularly with a song called "A Brighter Day" where he got everyone singing along.

It felt very much in line with the kind of music I wrote for NWW. Positive. Healing. Community. And, appropriately, he reference Barack Obama in his intro. It does feel like a new day here on Day 5 after he was elected.

AND THEN ANDO APPEARS!

I didn't see him until the evening was nearly over, but over against the wall, in our small audience of about 12, was James Kyson Lee, also known as Ando on the TV show, "Heroes," (which I totally love no matter how complicated it gets and I'm very upset that they fired Jeff Loeb who brought total comic book seriousness to it unlike "Smallville" which is more about how sexy we can make all the villains that pop up, not that I'm complaining about attractive people being on teevee. And Ando is a cool character. He's the only one that doesn't have super powers but they pretended to run him through with a sword. He's Hiro's best pal.)

I told you I'm a geek.

I was too shy to speak to him because, at the time, as I do whenever I see a celebrity, I start to doubt whether it's the real person. And I'm very shy. I honestly am. I'm just loud shy. Not afraid of being in front of people -- but one on one... not so much. Something I have to learn to get over.

By the time I convinced myself it was him, he was buying CDs from the talent and engaged with them. I didn't want to intrude. But, I overheard him say his name was James and that he does improv theater. It had to be him!

Got home, did a search. Bingo. Sure enough, on his Wiki Entry, it says he does improv theater. I was right! Ando was there! How cool!

I love L.A.

"But What About African Americans on Prop 8?"

Several people have commented both privately and publicly that in my little rant yesterday about Prop 8 that I was happy to criticize Mormons, Catholics and evangelicals for the passage of Prop 8, but that I failed to mention that 70% of African Americans also voted against us.

The fact is that I believe that the things that tied those opposing us together was not race, but religion (and age -- older folks resist change).

Still, it's a fair charge and one I was struggling with until I read this entry from Pam's House Blend.

If you look at the statistics and follow the money that supported Prop 8, the actual characteristic that those who voted "yes" actually share is a traditional belief system. This is across race, gender, etc. There were white people who voted for Prop 8. The LDS church, who provided millions to support Prop 8, is majorly white in its make-up! But suddenly, it's a "black community" problem. I hope I'm wrong, but this whole thing just seems like an excuse for some people to say some things about black people that they've been waiting to say for a long time.

She discusses how the term "the black community" is a myth:

First, let's get this label, "black community" on the table and out of the way. What is the "black community"? As a black woman, I really want to know. Is it my distinctly southern community that I grew up in? Is it my distant cousins' northern, inner-city community? Is it my good friend's west-coast, breezy community? What is it? Those two words have been thrown around so much in the wake of Prop 8 passing that I think a real definition needs to come out for it.

From my perspective, there is no "black community" in the sense that there is somehow a massive collective, hive mind that people with dark skin somehow share.

...No, the term "black community" is an objectification of a race of people who may or may not share qualities beyond the color of their skin. It takes away the personal and replaces it with a set of sterotyped expectations.

She ends her post with:

All of that being said, if someone wants to talk about the reason WHY so many black people voted "yes" on 8, that would be a different story. We could have a civil conversation about that, because that's asking questions of those who voted "yes", not of some ficticious "community" that's easy to place the blame on. We should also talk about why so many old people voted "yes", why so many religious people voted "yes". You get the point. We should be looking at what factors cause people to forget freedom and equality. I'm certain that "blackness" is not one of those factors.

Thank you, Pam. You said it perfectly.

You know, I get that people are angry that their own rights have been given and then taken away. But let's not act like blind soldiers standing in battlefield shooting at anything that moves.

Prop 8, Gay Marriage & Mormons.

Left: A protest on the streets of L.A. last night in front of the Mormon temple.

The Mormons must be fabulously wealthy to be able to raise at spend 10 million dollars to interfere in other peoples' lives, as they did in convincing religious Californians to strip us of our right to marry.

I think back to the country church my daddy raised us in and how we scraped by on pennies from people working graveyards at the paper mill. But the Mormon Church has millions to throw away on TV ads. Dishonest and ugly ones at that.

I think it's good that the protesters have tried to focus media attention on this sensational waste of tax-deductible money, but I would also remind my allies that religions LOVE being persecuted. It makes them feel noble, that they are fighting God's Fight.

This is an attention-diverter. The only issue that matters is equal rights under the law.

I'm convinced that if they hadn't run those dishonest and "what about the children?" spate of ads, the people of California would have seen our HUMANITY and sided with us. And the issue would have faded into obscurity as everyone went about their own business.

Since when are human rights subject to the whim of the majority, anyway? The supreme court made the right decision that we are equal before the law. It's too bad that it was our only recourse, given the absolute hate being thrown at glbt persons by religionists over the centuries.

It's all the same. This is about hate and bigotry. It's about trying to find a way to make us disappear. We have disturbed the primal forces of the heterosexual elite society and the Mormons and Catholics and evangelicals are striking back by taking away a right to marriage.

If you had lived in California, you would have seen the most vile, dishonest ad campaign imaginable focused on trotting children out and making it seem as if this law would require school trips to a leather bar. (The operative line was, "They'll be teaching children about gay marriage.") Well, that's a little like saying you're going to teach them about air. Air exists. Gay people exist. And I have news for you, most kids already know we exist.

But hey, anti-gay religionists have a history. They've tortured us, thrown us in jail, banned us from literature and history, subjected us to electric shock, filled us with hormones and castrated us. It's something they're used to. They frequently cite how badly they want to go back to "the good ol' days" just like white racists wish they didn't have to look at all those "coloreds" on TV.

But we have tasted freedom and equality, the most basic and primal forces of nature. How long do you think they can stand there and pretend they aren't doing something very wrong?

Find Joey (From Jason)

For those who may be interested, America's Most Wanted is planning to do a segment on my "adopted son" Jason Hungerford's aunt, Joey Lynn Offutt, who has been missing from Sykesville, PA since July 2007.

The show will air on FOX on Saturday, November 15. The exact air date of the segment is subject to change due to late-breaking news or recent captures. But as of right now, that's the date that is planned for the story to air.

For more information you can visit the Find Joey website: http://www.findjoey.org

Good News, Good News, Bad News.

Bad news first. I'm deeply disappointed that Florida, California, Arizona and Arkansas and other states voted to continue keeping gay people as second class citizens. Deeply, fiercely disappointed that people still don't understand that we are just folks, too. But the one good thing about it all is that younger people supported us. The new generation is not steeped in the homophobia of the old.

The world is changing and some day we will have the same equality before the law that straight people have. Jim and I will live the same lives now that we lived before, but with a new determination to help straight people understand that we do not threaten their marriages simply because we want inclusion.

Good news:
With all the election news and news coming from San Francisco about New World Waking! I neglected to mention that I had a follow-up PET/CT scan last Friday.

AND I AM TOTALLY CLEAN.

So, whatever set off the positive results the last time is now gone.

Best news:
Others more profound than I will celebrate and describe the elation almost everyone -- even Elizabeth Hasselback -- is feeling about the election of Barack Obama as president. It changes everything about how this country is perceived, not only by African American people who felt in their hearts that they would never see this moment, but by the rest of the world.

Having traveled a lot, I don't think Americans really appreciate how much the rest of the world actually pulls for us. How much they believe in the freedom, the rule of law and the idea of government of, by and for the people that the founders of this country all but invented. Our constitution changed the world from an monarchy-driven past into a people-driven future.

But it only started us on the road to full equality.

This election is the fulfillment of a dream. It also reminds us that we are, at our best, a melting pot of cultures, races, religions and faces from around the rest of the world. Barack Obama is us. America looked at him and said, "This is who we are. This is our face."

And now I have a prediction:

We will never again see another race for president where the candidates of choice are limited to four old white guys.

The doors are open and America is reborn. Maybe not to gay people yet, but that's not going to stop my enthusiasm or my love for this country.

Saints & Kitty Cats

Today was a day of healing in so many ways. I was asked to sing this morning because it was All Saints Sunday. We didn't have this day in the Baptist Church that I grew up in. Or if we did, I missed it somehow. (When you're a Baptist, everyone who's "saved" is a saint, as opposed to the Catholic Church where saint is some kind of official designation -- hmm, I wonder if Catholics have All Saints Day and if they only try to remember actual designated saints. It's all so confusing, no disrespect intended.)

The MCC in the Valley is a congregation I visit frequently. I like the minister, Rev. Bob Shore-Goss, because he's a total radical theologian with a twinkle in his eye. He's also one of the smartest and most educated men I've ever met. (I enjoy visiting MCC-LA for the same reason. Rev. Neil Thomas, with his smart, British style, is also a brilliant man, his sermons extemporaneous and emotional, different from Rev. Bob's witty, more professorial style.)

MCC in the Valley is a very warm congregation, partly because it's so intimate. It's also amazingly diverse. People of both genders in roughly equal numbers (as opposed to some GLBT churches which are predominately male). People of all races and ages -- and for all his scholarly knowledge, Pastor Bob is a hands-on pastor. You can tell he really cares about the people, yes, but also about the larger community.

It kind of reminds me of the church I grew up in. No one was rich. Sometimes we barely scraped by, month after month. But both my mom and dad got intimately involved in the lives of the church people. They knew they had a home and that if they needed anything, my dad would drive to the end of the earth to make sure they had it.

I don't really know the people at MCC in the Valley, but they are constantly raising money for the community food bank, or having people bring canned goods. They always serve food after each service and anyone can eat.

They are humble people. This is not a trap to get you in in order to sign you up to something or force their faith on you. It's almost as if they've made it a gathering place for anyone who just wants to hang out with sincere, loving people -- oh, and they happen to be Christians, but if you're not, no big deal. You're welcome to just be. No pressure. No sales job. No recruiting. Just comfort and welcome.

That's why I love them so much. How can you not?

I haven't sung there yet, but I let them know I'd be more than honored to do so (they don't know yet that I'm a big ham and will sing anywhere, anytime for anyone). But finally, they asked me to sing for this "All Saints Sunday."

Lissa, the music director, said they were going to play a slideshow of people who've passed, both friends and family, and they wanted me to sing during the slideshow.

Naturally, I planned to sang "Save Me A Seat," since it's a song about a memorial service. But then Lissa told me that so many people had submitted photos -- always at the last minute -- that the section would now be 15 minutes long.

"No problem," I told her.

"The last slide just says 'peace.'"

"Perfect."

So, now I'm thinking, "Okay, what songs should I use for a memorial slide show that will fill 15 minutes?"

And it was obvious. First, My Thanksgiving Prayer. Because, well, it's one of my very best songs and it's thanksgiving time and we're giving thanks for the chance to have known these people, yes?

Then, a song for the caregivers, "Going It Alone." And then, no choice. "Connected." It has the perfect last line. Now, if only the timing would work.

The service started. Rev. Bob is in Palm Springs for the Pride celebration. But the service was, as always full of laughter and ease. Oh, and on one wall there is this ANCIENT old pipe organ that was recently given to them. I think it even has a bellows. It's wonderful.

Finally, they came to the memorial spot. The slides opened with words printed on the screen. I began "Save Me A Seat." When I got to the "nachos" line, I got a good laugh which made me happy. About that time, the first face came up on the screen and my throat tightened.

It was a young face.

It just kind of hit me why we were there. I quickly looked down at my keyboard so that I could center myself. The worst thing you can do is cry (unless you're Audra McDonald) because you can't sing. Your throat closes up instantly.

And as I'm trying to not cry, I realize I haven't sung this song in forever. What's the next verse? How does the bridge go? Right. "Angel of the night time..." but is that on the first verse or the second.

I felt like I was on a highwire.

I wonder if people know what goes through the mind of a singer? I tried to just get back to the words. Stop thinking about the images. Just sing the words. If you can remember them.

All of this drama happens in a split second. I get my bearings. I'm singing the song. And then I make a mistake.

I look up. The first face I see is a younger man across the room. He has tears streaming down his face. Oh god. My throat again. My eyes burn a little.

But I push it down. I have to push it down. I look at other faces. They're watching the screen. I just concentrate on the song. The piano sounds beautiful. The microphone is making me sound REALLY great. Enjoy yourself, Steve. Just enjoy the moment.

I look at the screen. I see more faces. I'm celebrating them. And now as I get to the last line:

Then on a day
When you feel lost or hurt
Go to the kitchen
And get some dessert
Then sit at the table and eat
Just remember to save me a seat

I realize it's the perfect song for a memorial service.

I segue into "My Thanksgiving Prayer." I think of the Gay Chorus up in San Francisco. And December 1st. And Jennifer Holliday. And Piper Laurie. And I think how amazing it's going to be to hear it in a symphony hall. And I feel so thankful.

Then "Going It Alone." Then "Connected."

Now I'm wondering how the timing is going to go. I get to the last line.

"Will will always be..."

And the final slide comes up on the screen. "Peace."

"...connected to each other."

And fade to black. It couldn't have been more perfect if we had planned out, moment by moment.

It felt very healing. For all of us.

Now, you may be wondering what this has to do with kitty cats. Well, my friend Michael asked Jim and me if I wanted to go with him kitten shopping. KITTEN SHOPPING!!!

So, we went to two PetCos and saw kitties!!








And then I went home and laid down with my big ol' Steinbeck.

And that's the most healing thing of all. Just being with Jim and the cat.

Samuel Jackson Says, "No on 8."

Telling the Chorus about "New World Waking!"

Here is the story I told the chorus about the making of New World Waking!

SFGMC Rehearsing "New World Waking!"

Here is a sample of what I experienced hearing the San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus singing New World Waking! for the first time. Tell me what you think.

I'm Singing THIS SUNDAY at MCC in the Valley.

For those of you in the L.A. area, I've just been asked to sing for the Sunday morning service, Nov. 2, at MCC in the Valley. It's part of their All Saints Day celebration. They'll be running a video of people they've lost. So, I'll be singing "Save Me A Seat" as the video plays.

The First New World Waking Rehearsal.

Last night -- and I'll have video or pics later -- was one of the most transcendent and beautiful nights of my entire life.

I got to hear the full SFGMC sing my songs from New World Waking! and, as I wrote in a note to Kathleen, it was a magnificent experience.

First, she had me talk about the genesis of the work, beginning with playing John Lennon's piano, then about Gabi's Song and how Gabi turned tragedy into triumph and activism on behalf of school children. Then we would alternate. I would talk about the origins of each song and the chorus would sing it.

The first thing that made me happy was that every. song. worked. Each one was rich and beautiful. The chorus poured their hearts and souls into every number.

But it was "My Thanksgiving Prayer" that really DID it did it. And it should. Thanks to Kathleen's sensitive and complex arrangement -- a tour de force of both simplicity and complexity all at the same time -- what I told her in a note was the she took a simple song and turned it into a masterpiece. I was so caught up in it, I forgot it was mine!

I had my video camera on for all of it, so I'll post some things for you later on.

But this night is one I just wanted to mark in time.

Afterwards, a bunch of us went out and hung together, talking and laughing. It was so much fun. I got back to Ken's about 1 and was still buzzing, buzzing, buzzing. Didn't get to sleep until almost 3.

December 1st is going to be glorious. I cannot wait. And it's only a month away!

AIDS Treatment Should Start Sooner: Wash Post

Study: AIDS Treatment Should Start Sooner

Delaying treatment until a patient's immune system is damaged nearly doubles risk of dying in next few years compared to patients whose treatment begins earlier.

Tonight's the Night.

Tonight I hear the full chorus in rehearsal. They may as well bring a mop because I'm gonna be totally lost in a puddle of tears.

On Saturday I attended callback auditions for the solos. During "Gabi's Song," they had all the people there, about a dozen or so, sing the back-up harmonies -- again, my first time to hear them. And I had tears streaming down my face.

I tried to explain it to Jim later. I said to him, "It's one thing to do your own demo or recording of a song. No matter how much you try to distance yourself from the song, it's still just, in your mind, dumb ol' you."

But when a chorus of people are standing in front of you singing what you only theorized -- and when it sounds so much greater than even you imagined in your head -- then it means something else entirely is going on.

Or to put it more succinctly, I leaned over to Kathleen and said, "Wow. This sounds like a real SONG!"

I'll have more soon. All I know is that if this is how I react to a dozen singers, what am I gonna be like hearing a couple of hundred??

Just Bein' Steve.

It seems I have a reputation for being a little, oh what's the word... dizzy. No. Spacey. Maybe. Forgetful? Distracted? An idiot?

I was so careful to count out all my pills and put them in the little tray, to make sure I had everything set for my trip here to San Francisco. Jimmy even asked me if I had them all ready.

Then, I checked my wallet. Present. Keys. Present. Laptop. Socks, pants, shirts, underwear. Phone recharger. Check. Check. Check. Everything good to go. Perfect.

Saw on the news that there was a fire right on the highway to LAX. Bad sign. Getting to LAX from the Valley is difficult. The subway won't get you there because the Taxi drivers union protested. So, you take three trains and then change to a bus. Stupid and time consuming. But, there is a new bus from the Valley that only costs 4 bucks.

So Jim drove me to the bus after I made sure I had everything. Traffic was a nightmare. The airport was its usual nightmare of long lines.

I checked on the board for my 12 noon flight to SFO. No flight. But there's one at 11. It was 10:15. Then I realized... that WAS my flight. Noon was my ARRIVAL time. Boarding time was 10: 30. I had 15 minutes to get to the gate, and... a long line was ahead of me to get through security.

However, I didn't panic. I just waited patiently. I arrived at the gate just as the plane was shutting the doors. I got on. Whew.

And realized that I had filled my pill tray but hadn't put it in my bag.

Five days without my pills? Can't do it. Diabetes. Thyroid condition. AIDS. And several other conditions that require daily pill therapy or else I melt into the landscape and go into some kind of god knows what.

So, I finally called Jim. And realized that I had his bank card and he had no cash whatsoever. But could he find a way to overnight my pills to me?

And that's a day with Steve. I apologized profusely but he just said, "I'm used to it." Or, as Michael Sugar said after I called him, "Well, at least you're consistent."

I also got a phone call from Kathleen McGuire, the conductor of the Gay Men's Chorus, asking me if I could sing with them this evening. Sure!

Turns out it was a special appearance with about 30 of the chorus members singing for a benefit program at Bloomingdale's. What I didn't realize was that she was going to introduce more than a few songs from New World Waking.

My first time to actually hear the arrangements Kathleen had done.

And, of course, I forgot to bring my camera to the event, so you'll have to imagine it. They stood in front of a lighted wall hocking goods by some some fancy designer. That was kind of pretty.

Then came the songs. Wow. The arrangements are even more spectacular than I could have imagined. And this was with only about 30 people. When I go to the rehearsal on Monday, it will be with several hundred singers! I could barely breathe listening to songs.

Then I joined them on "My Rising Up" and, afterwards, many chorus members came up to me to tell me how much they were loving the music. One said that he began crying upon first hearing Gabi's Song. And he was so happy that the songs were addressing real lives and real stories.

Another chorus member said he was completely puzzled by the song "Franco Ate The Paperwork" because the words didn't make any sense to him. (They are impressionistic rather than narrative). But he said that after he started memorizing them, that suddenly they started making sense.

I assured him that they do indeed make sense and are connected in some weird way, but that it was one of the few times I venture outside traditional lyric writing to just let the lines almost construct themselves without my thinking about what they mean. But, yes, they do make sense. Kinda.

Another person said he's never seen a chorus piece where so many people were vying for solos. He said that this is a really good sign that the chorus itself is embracing it. And that made me very happy.

I am telling you all this not to toot my own horn but to make the point that when something is brand new, you can never know, as a writer, whether the material is connecting to the singers. All you can do is write it, mean it and let it go.

Several others approached me and said they felt this had all the resonance of their biggest choral commission, a brilliant piece called "NakedMan." Stylistically, the two pieces are worlds apart with NakedMan being a bit more classical sounding and musically sophisticated. New World Waking! is more pop, as that's the genre I'm most comfortable with.

So, I'm reveling in the lovely compliments and the emotional commitment of the chorus.

But, man, I am exhausted. After I got back to Ken's I could barely move. My feet felt like lead, and I remembered that I've been sick, off and on, for a month or more. With flu, then a couple of upper respiratory infections.

Being immobile for that long makes it hard to be up and about. And I realized I had pushed myself too far -- we did a lot of standing yesterday.

So, I'm going to take it easier over the weekend so that on Monday, I'll be at full strength for the chorus rehearsal when I'll hear everything out loud with the full chorus.

I cannot wait.

And I'm Off to San Francisco!

I'm going to San Francisco this weekend to see "In The Mood," a concert by the SFGMC Ensembles who are doing a show with the Seattle Men's Chorus ensemble called "Captain Smarypants," led by the witty and energetic Eric Lane Barnes -- in my next life can I please have his talent?. And then attend a rehearsal of the full chorus on Monday.

And yes, I'm very excited. In fact, as I'm writing this I have to go pee.

I'll update you from SF.