Living In The Bonus Round: My Beautician Sums Up Paris Hilton

Friday, June 08, 2007

My Beautician Sums Up Paris Hilton

Said in an Eastern European very heavy accent:

"She open her body. She not sick. She go to jail. She sick."

6 comments:

Colleen Mullins said...: You have a beautician?; 8:05 AM
Steve Schalchlin said...: Well, she's a beautician and she cuts my hair for 12 bucks. So, yeah, I have a beautician!; 7:30 PM
Bev Sykes said...: It's a misnomer.; 6:24 AM
Steve Schalchlin said...: "Hair care professional" is too long. "Barber" is not right. "Hair cutter lady" sounds stupid. I'm accepting any and all ideas.; 9:47 AM
Bev Sykes said...: hair stylist.
miracle worker.; 1:05 PM
Bev Sykes said...: PS...did you get my note about the FTP program?; 1:05 PM

Listen.

ORDER THE LONDON CAST ALBUM of THE LAST SESSION on JAY Records or at Amazon, produced by John Yap. Show was produced in London at the Tristan Bates Theatre by Rob Harris for CliMar Productions starring DARREN DAY, SIMONE CRADDOCK, AJ DEAN, RON EMSLIE and LUCY VANDI. Directed by Guy Retallack.

Purchase THE LAST SESSION, NEW YORK ORIGINAL CAST ALBUM at

Listen on Spotify.

Quick Links

WATCH Steve's amazing perfomance at the World Domination Summit.

Get Steve's most recent album, Tales from the Bonus Round iTunes, Spotify and IS NOW AVAILABLE on Amazon, Google Play and every other download and streaming service around the world.

DOWNLOAD sing-along materials -- lyrics and mp3s -- for TALES FROM THE BONUS ROUND.

NEWS: Steve has been honored with the first Broadway World 2015 Special Editor's Award for Excellence in Songwriting by BroadwayWorld,com. Here is their description:

In a field with many deserving candidates, this year's first ever BWW New York Cabaret Award for "Excellence in Songwriting" goes to Steve Schalchlin, a New York-based composer and lyricist who has been on quite a cabaret roll the past two years. Although his two biggest recent projects, the CD and subsequent show, Tales From the Bonus Round, and his song cycle, New World Waking, were years in development, Schalchlin performed both in New York over the past couple of seasons.

Bonus Round-which featured Schalchlin at the piano as lead singer--was performed as a cabaret show at the Metropolitan Room in October 2013 (and received a BWW Award nomination for "Best CD Release," and one of the songs garnered a nomination for "Best Original Song for a Cabaret Show"), while New World Waking received a standing ovation when performed at the Urban Stages Winter Rhythms Festival last month.

"What makes Steve stand out above the rest for his recent body of work is that he not only writes both music and lyrics, but also performs his songs," says BWW New York Cabaret Editor Stephen Hanks.

"But even more impressive is that his songs in Bonus Round compellingly chronicled his battle with the life-threatening AIDS disease, while New World Waking offered important messages about how our planet needs to finally overcome violence, war, racism, and prejudice-and how it might be possible through the power of music.

Schalchlin's lyrically powerful and pleasingly melodic songs couldn't be timelier."

Musical Awards and Honors

For the record and to impress our friends and relatives, a partial list of the honors for our musicals "The Big Voice: God or Merman?" and "The Last Session" which I wrote with life partner and playwright Jim Brochu of the recent hit play about Zero Mostel, "Zero Hour".

2013 The Autograph Best Original Music, The Last Session-London. What's On Stage.

Best Score, L.A. Drama Critics Circle 1997 & 2003.

Best Musical, L.A. Ovation Awards, 2005.

Best Musical, ADA Awards 2005.

Best Musical Director, ADA Awards 2005.

Best Lead Actor in a Musical nomination. L.A. Ovation Awards 2005.

PFLAG-LA Oscar Wilde Award, 1997 & 2003.

Best Concert of a Musical, Best Original Writing, Desert Theatre League Awards 2005.

Best Theatrical Production nomination, Off-Broadway & L.A. GLAAD Media Awards, 2004.

Best L.A. Theatre Production, GLAAD Media Awards, 1997.

(And thanks from me to all those groups. Prizes are fun. I like prizes.)